Saison 2 - Inscris-toi gratuitement et surfe sans pub !
Having a conscience is brutal.
Sam
- - -
Charlotte: Hello.
Violet: He's not back yet.
Charlotte: Do you expect him back soon?
Violet: He's getting me soup.
Charlotte: Soup's good.
Violet: I despise soup. But it helps when you're queasy. Which I am. Sit down if you want to.
Charlotte: You're queasy.
Violet: The word queasy makes me feel ... queasy.
- - -
Noah: Look, I'm sorry if I ... you know ... I shouldn't have. I don't know what's gotten into me. Putting you in this position. Believing that you had feelings for me. I don't know what's gotten into me.
Addison: You weren't wrong. It wasn't all in your head. But ... I can't let this happen.
- - -
Addison: Where's Katie?
Violet: She's still in the birthing suite. She needs some space. I'm afraid I'm not going to get through. She's in there staring at my belly. I represent everything she wants. She hates me for it.
Pete: She doesn't hate you. She just wants something she can't have. And that's hard.
- - -
Addison: You shouldn't be here Noah.
Noah: I am coming to you as a doctor, okay, because I did my homework. You're the best neo-natal specialist on the West Coast and I want the best for my wife.
Addison: Well maybe what's best for your wife is to not have a doctor who you're-
Noah: In love with.
- - -
Charlotte: You really think Uncle Coop would do any better?
Violet: You know Cooper's mother told me that when he was a kid he had this doll and he carried it around all the time and he named her Ernesta.
- - -
Naomi: So. You got Maya?
Sam: Yes. I have Maya, so you go and do your thing with the oats.
Naomi: With the what?
Sam: The oats.
Naomi: Oh, sow my oats. Yes. Yes. Thank you. Thank you for calling him.
Sam: You know you look a little slutty. Maybe if you changed ... cover up ...
Naomi: Oh, no, no, no, no. Slutty's good. You know, for sowing oats, slutty is very good, you know. I'm not trying to get a husband here.
- - -
Charlotte: Nothing you can say is going to make someone do something they don't want to do.
Cooper: Brandon needs her.
Charlotte: Brandon wants her. What Brandon needs is surgery and to find a woman that's not going to run out on him when the going gets tough.
- - -
Naomi: I am sowing my oats. These are oats. They're oats that are not married cardiologists.
Addison: Whoa, whoa, whoa. There is nothing going on with Noah, okay. It was a flirtation, but he's married so it's over. At least at a bar there'd be cocktails.
Naomi: Yeah, but the dudes wouldn't be wearing shorts.
- - -
Naomi: I am sowing my oats. These are oats. They're oats that are not married cardiologists.
Addison: Whoa, whoa, whoa. There is nothing going on with Noah, okay. It was a flirtation, but he's married so it's over. At least at a bar there'd be cocktails.
Naomi: Yeah, but the dudes wouldn't be wearing shorts.
- - -
Pete: We've made a decision.
Violet: Together?
Sheldon: Paternity test.
Pete: Now, one of us gets out of your hair, the other one ... has a right to know.
Cooper: Look guys ...
Pete: Know what, Cooper? You moved in, you pushed us out, you claimed your territory, but one thing is clear. This kid you're talking to, is not your kid, so, stay out of it.
Violet: Look, Pete ...
Sheldon: The answer is right there for us to know.We know that you don't want to face it, but we do.
- - -
Noah: You're here late.
Addison: Yeah, well, you know, babies don't tell time.
- - -
Cooper: Violet, you can't do a CVS paternity test for a few weeks. The point is mute.
Violet: Moot. The point is moot.
- - -
Addison: There was definitely flirting. With the surgeon.
Naomi: Uh huh.
Addison: (singing) Cute surgeon, cute surgeon.
- - -
Charlotte: Maybe Cooper's right. Keeping her alive isn't the same as saving her life.
Noah: Look, I am sorry Annie can't go to school or go surfing. But is the chance to do that for a month or two, is that worth giving up the chance of living past thirteen?
Charlotte: She's got nothing left in her Noah. Not even the will to fight you. So maybe you should ask yourself, who are you doing this for?
- - -
Cooper: Charlotte, you did a good thing. A thing that makes me love you even more.
Charlotte: I don't need you to love me even more! I slept with Archer. And you forgive me. You are good, you are the good one, you do good things. You and ... it makes me sick. You loving me, it makes me literally sick to my stomach. I slept with somebody else. I screwed Archer's brains out and you forgive it? Who does that? So you're the good one and I'm the bad one. And I don't want credit for saving a little girl's life, I don't want it.
Cooper: You need to forgive yourself.
Charlotte: Stop loving me. Just stop loving me.
Cooper: No, no. I will not stop loving you. No.
Charlotte: I'm sorry.
- - -
(to Violet) You're alone here. You have Cooper and the baby. But you're all alone. And you don't have to be.
Pete
- - -
(Jill is testifying in court.)
Violet: Now why are you here, Jill?
Jill: That man robbed me. He didn't just steal my car and my money. He stole my sense of security. He stole my ability to sleep at night. He stole my sense of self-control. So I came here today to get them back.
- - -
Archer: I like women. I like a lot of women. But I am not married to Naomi and she is not the mother of my children.
Addison: Naomi sat by your side when you had surgery. She held your hand. You're upstairs sticking your tongue down her throat, seeing her every day, letting her believe you two have something together.
Archer: I thought I was dying.
Addison: You are asking me to lie for you. You are making me feel dirty, and cheap, and I'm ten years old again. Telling Mother that I went out for ice cream with Daddy, when really I'm sitting in his office while he's screwing his secretary down the hall.
- - -
Charlotte: Move in with me, Cooper.
Cooper: Charlotte!
Charlotte: I know you care about Violet and the baby, and I understand why you wanted to move in with her. But you can still be there for both of them, without living at her place.
Cooper: Violet's afraid to be alone. So I need to be there for her.
Charlotte: I'm your girlfriend.
Cooper: And I am here for you. And, living with Violet? Doesn't change that.
- - -
Pete: Beverly. Are you okay?
Beverly: Oh yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I just ... I had to see you again.
Pete: This is the fourth time this week.
Beverly: Well, I checked your schedule and I know you have an opening.
Pete: Beverly!
Beverly: Oh come on, Pete, just a quickie.
- - -
Leanne: (just after giving birth) I want to hold him. Can I hold my little boy? What's wrong?
Addison: It's not a boy.
Mitch: What? The ultrasound was wrong?
Leanne: It's a girl?
Addison: I'm not sure.
- - -
Violet: I just saw Ryan and Eleanor in the stairwell.
Sheldon: You mean Ryan and Sasha?
Violet: No, I mean Ryan and Eleanor. They were comunicating. Lip to lip.
- - -
Addison: Why rush it?
Naomi: Because I want to go away with my boyfriend. Like a woman. Like a woman with a lover. Lover. Lover, I like that. It's a lot better than boyfriend. He's my lover. What do you think?
Addison: Lover ...
Naomi: No. It sounds stupid. It's so like soap opera.
Addison: No, it's got ...
Naomi: Paramour ...
- - -
Charlotte: I slept with Archer Montgomery. I just thought you shoulds know.
Cooper: No! No! You don't get to just walk away from me after telling me that. How dare you. How dare you do this.
Charlotte: It's just the way I am.
Cooper: Well that's crap. You did the one thing you could, to push me away, to make me make a choice and not you. Guess what, Charlotte? That's not gonna work. I'm not going anywhere. You want to sleep with some guy to hurt me? Make me back off? Too bad. I'm here. I'm storming the freaking castle for you and you so underestimated me. What, you thought I was so weak that I'm going to walk away because my pride got wounded? You're mine and I'm not walking away because you're scared.
- - -
Pete: They're fighting the way you should be fighting.
Beverly: I don't want to be the one ... who dies.
Pete: Then be the one who lives.
- - -
Addison: Dr Shepherd!
Derek: Dr Shepherd?
Addison: Well if you're going to act like some random surgeon with a God complex, I'm going to speak to you like one.
- - -
Derek: Next time I save your life, Archer, a simple thank you would suffice. If you were a neurosurgeon and not just a neurotic, you would know that it is common for a CSP to temporarily fill with fluid, post surgery. Repeat the CT in a month and this will be clear.
Naomi: What? You mean he's going to be fine?
Derek: No, he's going to be an ass, like he's always been.
- - -
Cooper: Look, I know you're upset about me living with Violet. I know you feel excluded, but it doesn't have to be like that. You could be part of it.
Charlotte: Part of it, Cooper? Really? What exactly do you think that would look like? Me living with the two of you, reading Mother Goose to Violet's swollen belly while you're giving her pregnancy massages? Or how about me putting on my Bo Peep outfit, trying to seduce you while she's calling out from the next room for a puke bucket? Or, better yet, me taking video of you and Violet bringing your little snot home?
Cooper: It's not my little snot and I'm not trying to be the father.
- - -
Addison : Shut up, Derek. You cornered me. I let you corner me. This is the hotdog Thanksgiving all over again.
Derek: What?
Addison : Oh you know what. Your mother breaks her wrist. So the day before Thanksgiving, you invite 34 people over to our house, without asking me, knowing I've never cooked a turkey in my life. Your sister gets salmonella and your mother, who never liked me, accuses me of trying to kill everyone. And you, make hot dogs, and you're the hero.
Derek: Addison.
Addison : No, it's the exact same thing, Derek. You make some cavalier statement and then I got to do all the work, no matter how it turns out, you're the hero and I'm incompetent.
- - -
Naomi: (talking about Sam's asthma attack) I never saw an attack this bad before. I mean he wasn't exerting, he wasn't walking through a field of wild, blooming, flowers. He was just in a hospital.
Addison: And yet watching you doting over Archer, he was unable to get oxygen into his lungs. Do I need to draw a picture?
- - -
Sam: It's hard to believe the five of us back togeher again.
Naomi: Six. Six, Archer makes six.
Sam: Right, six, I forgot about Archer, six.
Mark: And if you count the worms in Archer's brain, that makes, like, twenty six.
- - -
Miranda: I always liked Addison. Don't always like everybody, but I always liked her. She smells nice, she's polite, she saves babies. So what happened to the brother? Was he lost at birth? Raised by wolves?
Sam: He's not always such an ass.
- - -
Addison: Dr Shepherd!
Derek: Dr Shepherd?
Addison: Well if you're going to act like some random surgeon with a God complex, I'm going to speak to you like one.
- - -
Derek: Archer's awake and complaining. Am I right? Heought to be happy he's on five of morphine.
Addison: He says his vision is blurry and he would like you to run another CT.
Derek: No.
Addison: No?
Derek: Your brother's an ass. His vision is probably impaired because he can't see past his own ego.
- - -
Sam: Hah!
Naomi: Excuse me?
Sam: I said, hah! Hah, because I was right. Hah, because it was an allergic reaction, so hah to Mark and Addison and you, if you believed them. It was not a panic attack. It was an asthma attack. I am not pathetic. I am a man. I am a man with asthma. So, hah!
- - -
Cooper: Look, I know you're upset about me living with Violet. I know you feel excluded, but it doesn't have to be like that. You could be part of it.
Charlotte: Part of it, Cooper? Really? What exactly do you think that would look like? Me living with the two of you, reading Mother Goose to Violet's swollen belly while you're giving her pregnancy massages? Or how about me putting on my Bo Peep outfit, trying to seduce you while she's calling out from the next room for a puke bucket? Or, better yet, me taking video of you and Violet bringing your little snot home?
Cooper: It's not my little snot and I'm not trying to be the father.
- - -
You're a surgeon! It's your instinct to cut, not mine.
Archer
- - -
Archer: I'm signing myself out.
Naomi: What? Against all medical advice?
Archer: Against your medical advice. Which makes you my doctor, so you have doctor-patient confidentiality.
Naomi: What, wait, wait. You want me to lie to Addison?
Archer: Yes.
- - -
Cooper: I need a favor, Charlotte.
Charlotte: I need 3 more nurses, 6 more hours in a day, mandatory martinis at lunch, and, oh yes, to know why the man I was sleeping with is living with another woman.
- - -
Violet: Looks like you're good at your job.
Dell: Well, I'm not a doctor but, yes, I know a thing or two about pregnant women.
Violet: Stomach cramps?
Dell: Aren't about the baby.
Violet: What are you talking about? I've an alien pea growing inside of me.
- - -
Dell: I can't believe it. You, pregnant.
Violet: I don't want anyone to know.
Dell: What about the father? Does he know?
Violet: It's complicated.
Dell: Well you don't owe me any explanations.
Violet: It could be Pete or it could be Sheldon.
Dell: Keeping it local. That's cool.
- - -
Cooper: You need to see someone.
Violet: I'm fine.
Cooper: No. You're a doctor. You need to see Addison or Naomi about the pregnancy today. You sound crap.
Violet: I didn't know you were moving in to be the pregnancy police.
- - -
Archer: I have a date.
Naomi: You have a date? With another woman?
Archer: I don't date men. I support the choice but ...
- - -
Cooper: I want you to talk to me. Do you not see that we are a perfect match and you're screwing it up?
Charlotte: I got embarrassed and humiliated. So don't tell me about screwing things up. You think it's easy for me to look you in the face after I sobbed in your lap like a 12 year old girl, asked you to marry me, and got turned down?
- - -
Archer: They seem like a nice couple.
Addison: They're divorced. They barely speak.
Archer: I guess they spoke long enough to conceive.
- - -
Addison: I am not glad that you are working for the enemy. And you're going to have to learn to stay out of my personal life. But if you want to be here then ...
Archer: This is going to be fun.
- - -
Cooper: I want you to talk to me. Do you not see that we are a perfect match and you're screwing it up?
Charlotte: I got embarrassed and humiliated. So don't tell me about screwing things up. You think it's easy for me to look you in the face after I sobbed in your lap like a 12 year old girl, asked you to marry me, and got turned down?
- - -
Okay. Captured the clot. Removing the coil. Injecting the dye. Now aint that a pretty sight?
Archer
- - -
Archer: I have a date.
Naomi: You have a date? With another woman?
Archer: I don't date men. I support the choice but ...
- - -
Naomi: Teri Hughes' mother came in today.
Violet: Why?
Naomi: We have Teri and Mark's embryos in our freezer and she wants them implanted ... in her. I don't know what to do.
Violet: I do. Say no.
Naomi: Well, I know there are issues with her carrying her own grandchild, and her age, but Sharon seems to-
Violet: I'm not interested in Sharon's reasons. Teri was my patient. I'm interested in what she'd think. And she would never ever want this.
Naomi: But how can you be so sure?
Violet: Teri hated her mother. Giving that woman another child, Teri's child, would have been her worst nightmare.
- - -
Violet: I'm lost, Cooper. I mean I see it, I feel better, but most of the time I walk around lost and alone and scared.
Cooper: Well then I will be here, and we'll sit and we'll eat and figure this out. We'll work through everything and make it okay. Together.
- - -
Cooper: We're so not a cute couple in and out of each other's pockets, finishing each other's sentences. But we're still a couple. We're us and I love us and I am nowhere near ready to give up. Even if you are, I'm not giving up.
Charlotte: Well, won't that be lonely.
- - -
Cooper: I'm sorry I said no about the marriage, but I did tell you I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. Can you tell me what I did wrong that's so unforgivable?
Charlotte: If you really don't get it, I can't help you.
Cooper: Well, we have to talk about this.
Charlotte: No. We don't. And we won't. So save the rest of your earnest little I can make it all better act and leave, okay?
- - -
Okay. Captured the clot. Removing the coil. Injecting the dye. Now aint that a pretty sight?
Archer
- - -
Cooper: You're in the closet?
Violet: Seeing if it's less scary in here.
Cooper: I like it.
Violet: Me too.
- - -
Hi, Sis. How do you like my new office?
Archer
- - -
Violet: I'm pregnant.
Cooper: You're pregnant?
Violet: And I don't know who the father is. Cooper, we are two of the most emotionally stunted people I've ever known. We've never made any progress in our personal life. We don't do personal growth and now, here you are, getting married, and I'm pregnant and we're just growing all over the place.
- - -
Nora: People are staring.
Violet: They're staring at me. They're wondering who's walking the mother of the bride down the aisle.
- - -
Charlotte: I want to marry you, tomorrow. In Vegas.
Cooper: Tomorrow? My mother-
Charlotte: Families complicate things. Family's messy. Let's do this. Marry me Cooper Freedman.
- - -
Nora: I feel so scared. You've never felt this. How can you know?
Violet: I'm going to break all the rules and I'm going to tell you something about me. I am more afraid than I've ever been in my life. I'm pregnant and that is paralysingly, terrifyingly scary for me.
- - -
Addison: Why is everyone so stuck on what did or didn't happen with Wyatt?
Naomi: Well who is is stuck on it? Are you going to tell Kevin?
Addison: No. There's nothing to tell. It didn't happen. I didn't cheat. I didn't go out on a date. I just went into his office and kissed him.
- - -
Naomi: I'm still hoping that the Sinclairs will come through.
Addison: They walked in a crisis. Would you want that for your kid?
- - -
Cooper: What we need to do now is get Gracie to the hospital. Get her in isolation while we figure out what to do.
Daron: Okay, I'll take her now.
Addison: Daron, you can't take her. You can't touch her. You can't be with her or you'll die.
- - -
Addison: Sonia is being fun because she's trying to make a good impression. That's what happens when things are new. Look at me and Kevin. Not so new, not so nice, either.
Naomi: That sounds like marriage.
- - -
Don't scare the erection. It's up Violet. Full mast.
Sheldon
- - -
Cooper: What's your problem, you'd think someone died.
Charlotte: Dying. Big Daddy.
Cooper: Big Daddy? Well that is a screen-name. When you get back on the horse, you really get back on the horse, huh?
Charlotte: Cooper-
Cooper: What's killing him? The sex or the cold fish attitude?
Charlotte: Big Daddy's my father.
- - -
Violet: I thought I was okay with it. But I'm not sure if I am okay with it. I'm sleeping with two men. Do I get a lecture now?
Cooper: Yes. Yes, you do. This is good. This is progress.
- - -
Charlotte: Momma's taken to her room with the vapors and none of them wants to make a decision about Big Daddy.
Cooper: The vapors? You have a medical degree from John Hopkins. You've diagnosed your mother with the vapors?
- - -
Violet: How can I choose? I mean, Pete is ... Pete's all heat. I just see him and I melt. And Sheldon is comfort.
Addison: Like mac 'n' cheese.
- --
(Violet is being examined by Addison)
Addison: I think that it's hard to figure out who the right person is.
Violet: Thank you.
Addison: Yeah, I mean Kevin's great but is he the one? Or is it someone else?
Naomi: I want to be okay with this Sonia thing, I do, I do, but I don't think I care that Sam is dating. Do I care? Am I in denial? No, this is about Maya, right? I'm not crazy, this is about Maya, I'm not crazy.
Violet: Does this really look like the time for therapy?
- - -
Violet: I'm a mess.
Sheldon: We're all a mess. Don't you know that by now? All I know is I don't mind finding out who you are.
- - -
Violet: Okay, look, Pete, Sheldon, I'm ... sleeping with both of you. I thought it was okay. But it's not. I realise that you just can't do that. I can't do that. And I'm sorry.
Pete: Who are you?
- - -
Wyatt: Want to grab a bite?
Addison: Actually, I am starved but I am supposed to ... meet someone.
Wyatt: Ah! The cop.
Addison: Yes. The cop.
Wyatt: So you really think a hot date and fine dining is better than a guy you can barely stand and cafeteria mac 'n' cheese?
Addison: Well, I do love the mac 'n' cheese.
- - -
Wyatt: Takes me back to residency. When life was simple.
Addison: You see, I have a hard time picturing you as an intern, taking crap from your attending.
Wyatt: By year 2, they all hated me.
Addison: It took them that long?
- - -
Addison: Remember when Maya told you to get a life?
Naomi: I have a life. I have a great life.
Addison: I'm just standing, here on my patio, in the dark, spying on your ex, his girlfriend and your daughter.
- - -
Addison: Wyatt asked me out on a date.
Naomi: Oh.
Addison: He's different than I thought.
Naomi: Okay, well, can I just say that you're in a relationship, so, you know, knees together.
- - -
Addison: If you want to work with Wyatt again, work with Wyatt again. Don't not do it because of what I say.
Naomi: You comfortable with that?
Addison: I'm not comfortable thinking that my advice colors what you say or what you do. Hate him for yourself, or not.
- - -
(to Naomi) How does Kevin leave one sock behind? I mean, don't you think he'd notice that one bare foot when he went to put his shoes on?
Addison
- - -
Cooper: Are you still having sex with the same guy? The same guy, huh? Finally going to 'fess up and tell me who?
Violet: I told you whom it was, and you didn't believe me.
Cooper: Who it was. And you told me Pete, which is an obfuscation, Lying really.
Violet: It's Pete, Cooper. I'm having sex with Pete. You need me to prove it to you?
- - -
Pete: Do you want my advice?
Addison: Please.
Pete: Ignore all advice.
- - -
Pete: (talking about Violet) The conversation is easy. The sex is ... good. We laugh a lot. It's no big deal. We're just similar. We want the same things, so it's working out. What?
Addison: You've got all that, and it's no big deal. Isn't that what a relationship is?
- - -
Sheldon: (to Violet) Did you do something different? You look great.
Pete: She did something different.
Sheldon: Well whatever it is, keep doing it.
- - -
(to Charlotte) I have a mom who feels like she lost one son to autism and maybe losing another one to measles and she's got another one sitting out here, exposed, and maybe I'm just not persuasive enough. But he's vulnerable. She's not going to let me do anything about it. So I'm really sorry if I piled on some paperwork for you, but I don't need crap from you, right now.
Cooper
- - -
Sam: Well that's it. You're not going to read it and ask me about our policies on work-related injuries or-
Sonia: Oh sure you did a very thorough job.
Sam: You knew that I wouldn't be able to find it and you knew that I would kill myself trying to come up with it.
Sonia: Well, by law your office needs to have that. Now you do.
Sam: You enjoy this, don't you? The power, coming in here, pushing me around.
Sonia: Not at all. I've been nothing but professional.
Sam: You've been a bully. You just can't stand real doctors, can you?
- - -
Sam: Alright, maybe I was wrong. But for the past two days, you haven't even looked me in the eye, or even acknowledged that I'm a human being. What is your problem?
Sonia: For two days I've been thinking your lips would taste like chocolate and I couldn't look at them.
- - -
Pete: I don't think it's ridiculous. The idea that you and me that we could be more than sex.
Violet: Pete.
Pete: Don't think about what Cooper would say. Or Sam, or Naomi, or anybody. Just think about what you think. Why does it have to be a crazy idea?
- - -
(to Addison) Apparently I'm a mysogynistic, manipulative son of a bitch. And ungrateful. You agreed to do something you didn't want to do and I should have been more gracious.
Wyatt
- - -
Addison: Hey, do you think I missed the boat with Pete?
Naomi: Ugh. You didn't miss a Pete boat. You dodged hurricane Pete.
Addison: You really think it's gonna end that badly?
Naomi: Are we talking about the same Pete?
- - -
Naomi: I want to do something bad. Oh no, no, no, it's not bad, actually I think it's going to make me feel good, only Sam and Addison are going to hate me. Wyatt Lockhart.
Violet: You're going to sleep with Wyatt Lockhart?
Naomi: No, no, no, no. I'm considering consulting with him on a case. But sleeping with him-
Violet: I'm sorry. You said that it was something bad but it was going to make you feel good, so I ...
Naomi: So you went straight to sex?
Violet: I did. I did. I went to sex.
- - -
(Addison and Kevin are in bed together)
Addison: Wow!
Kevin: Better.
Addison: Better? What, than me?
Kevin: No. Better. My wounds. I'm healed. I'm good.
- - -
(to Naomi) You talked about this practice. The way it's supposed to run. The way we're supposed to treat our patients. You talked about not wanting to give up and then you're going to go downstairs to that place to work with that woman who is doing everything possible to undermine us. To work for that man who's more concerned about getting recognised for his work than which patient lives or dies. How is that not selling out?
Sam
- - -
Cooper: Hey Pete have you ever paid for sex?
Pete: Don't have to.
- - -
Violet: I slept with Pete! (she pauses) There, I told you.
Cooper: You know, I expected better from you.
Violet: I'm sorry. It just happened -
Cooper: You know what? If that's how you want to play it, fine.
Violet: What are you talking about?
Cooper: When you're ready to be mature and tell me who you really slept with I'll be around for you, Violet.
Violet: I'm not lying to you. I really slept with Pete.
Cooper: Okay. (he steps out the door)
Violet: Where are you going?
Cooper: I don't want to be late for my date with Angelina Jolie.
- - -
(Kevin is sitting on the stairs)
Addison: How was work?
Kevin: This is as far as I got.
Addison: You been sitting here all day?
Kevin: Yeah. Yeah, my ass fell asleep two hours ago. It's not funny.
- - -
(Charlotte has just taken the pregnancy test and is waiting for the results with Cooper)
Charlotte: Now, all we have to do is wait.
Cooper: Come on. Little Walter? (he pretends to be holding a baby)
Charlotte: Are you trying to be funny?
Cooper: No, that was my grandfather. He was a piano tuner. Maybe he'll play an instrument, maybe the trumpet.
Charlotte: Please. It'll be a girl. Marjorie.
Cooper: Your grandmother?
Charlotte: My horse. Last animal I ever had. I was 15. She broke her ankle and we had to shoot her.
- - -
Violet: I am sex-less. I am without sex. Which can be healthy. Celibacy in some cultures is seen as a sign of strength. So I am strong. I am a strong healthy woman.
Addison: Hm, I miss sex.
Naomi: What are you talking about? You've got a gorgeous man sleeping in your bed.
Addison: Yeah, that's all he is doing in my bed. Doctor's orders.
Naomi: You have sex on the horizon, which is better than having had amazing sex in your recent past with no visible sign of it happening ever again.
- - -
Pete: Is that Ray Daniels?
Sam: Who's Ray Daniels?
Pete: Come on Sam, Rocket-Ray? The Tour de France, Olympic gold medalist. You follow sports.
Sam: Yeah, football, basketball. Riding a bike is not a sport.
- - -
Cooper: How are you feeling?
Charlotte: I'm on the pill.
Cooper: You're a doctor. You know that's not 100%.
Charlotte: Cooper, I would know if I was pregnant.
Cooper: Cranky.
Charlotte: I'm always cranky.
Cooper: Glowing.
Charlotte: I'm always glowing. Now please, stop stalking me and my womb.
- - -
(to Cooper) Your paranoia is contagious. Let's get this done. I have sticks and I intend to pee on them. And if your boys swam through my weeds and got me pregnant, I'm gonna make you suffer every step of the way.
Charlotte
- - -
What do you have to help with erections? (Pete looks taken aback) Okay, now I'm humiliated.
Violet (to Pete)
- - -
Lockhart: I like you, Monty. Let me take you out to dinner, show you I'm grateful. And I'm not as bad as you think.
Addison: I'll take your word for it. Oh, and if you call me Monty again, I'm going to plunge a scalpel through your hand.
- - -
Violet (talking about Doug's wife): You murdered her.
Doug: I put her out of her misery.
Violet: No. You put yourself out of your misery.
- - -
Cooper: Regular normal people are driven to murder every day. Right, love, love will do it every time. Twisted, sick, messed-up love.
Sam: Cooper, Charlotte King is still alive, right?
- - -
Naomi: Who knew that meaningless sex could be amazing?
Violet: You had meaningless sex? Congratulations.
- - -
Naomi: Where's the prodigal brother?
Addison: He's showing Kevin around, hopefully making nice. Apparently Archer didn't appreciate Kevin treating him like a criminal when they first met.
Naomi: You mean when he broke in like a criminal?
Addison: Exactly.
- - -
Power. Speed. Control. Who knew go-kart racing could be better than sex?
- - -
I've brought you a present. {She reveals the chocolate paint on her body) It's all edible. In fact that's chocolate frosting you're staring at. Bon appetit. You want me to melt?
Charlotte (to Cooper who is lying on his bed)
- - -
Pete: I am thinking we should hit a bar tonight after work. Try again. There are so many beautiful women in L.A..
Sam: Pete, Naomi and I, we just came out of a long term relationship. I don't know if I'm ready to...
Pete: Sam! Cooper is dating!
Sam: Cooper is dating the antichrist!
Pete: Well... At least he is dating.
- - -
Violet: You're opening a practice here? What about Cooper?
Charlotte: This has nothing to do with him.
Violet: He's your boyfriend.
Charlotte: This is business and Cooper is personal.
Violet: It's not that simple.
Charlotte: Maybe not for you but I am not a therapist. I don't have to talk about my feelings until everyone else's ears bleed.
- - -
Addison: You're living a lie, Daniel. You're cheating on two women. And cheating ruins lives.
Daniel: I'm not the one who ruined lives here today.
- - -
Cooper the Internet dater is in a healthy relationship and my too-good-to-be-true boyfriend thinks I'm a psychotic bunny boiler.
Addison
- - -
(Addison is driving and talking on the phone with Naomi)
Naomi: Hey, Addison.
Addison: I think I may have gone too far.
Naomi: With what?
Addison: I followed him.
Naomi: What do you mean you followed him?
Addison: At first it was just a routine surveillance.
Naomi: You are not a cop!
Addison: I followed him to work, to the precinct which is apparently where I should have stopped.
Naomi: Oh, God. Where - where are you now, crazy woman?
Addison: I'm not insane. I went to the precinct. Five minutes later he comes roaring out of the parking garage in another car, a van.
Naomi: Dit it - dit it not occur to you that he might be working?
Addison: Of course he could be working. Only maybe he's not working. People lie. They lie and they cheat and they ruin people's lives and I'm not gonna be one of those women who gets dumped.
Naomi: Addison - Addison, you have to be careful. (Addison pulls over, she can see the sirens and a police intervention)
Addison: Or maybe he's working.
- - -
(Addison and Kevin lay naked together, eating noodles on the floor)
Addison: So if I lease the fourth floor then Sam and Naomi hate me, but if I don't the Practice may go under.
Kevin: So you lease it right?
Addison: You make it sound easy.
Kevin: I lead guys everyday, need to make tough decisions, sometimes that means pissing of a friend for the good of the group.
Addison: I want people to stop being pissed off.
Kevin: Well, you need to decide if you wanna be a good friend, or a good leader?
Addison: You're smart, I don't like that.
Kevin: Yes, you do. (Addison smiles) You want me to eat noodles off your back?
Addison: Yes, please.
- - -
(Kevin visits Addison at the work)
Addison: Hey, to what do I owe this surprise?
Kevin: I've got this coming weekend off and I was thinking you, me, Cabo San Lucas, weekend away Pamia, very fancy, perfect clear blue waters. (shows Addison the tickets) We could get away... too much?
Addison: No... Yes... No... Yes... yes. No here's look here's the thing, we've been out a few times and am it's, it's been great I, I really like you...
Kevin: Is this where you break up with me?
Addison: No-- No, it's just am-- I have these rules, while they're stupid rules really but, in the past when I don't have rules it didn't go so well... my point is that now that I have my rules I don't wanna break them you know.
Kevin: Yeah... I have no idea what you're talking about. I wanna know but am rules?
Addison: Sex rules.
Kevin: Rules about sex?
Addison: You know a hotel means a room, a room means a bed, a bed means...
Kevin: You have sex rules.
Addison: I'm waiting.
Kevin: Until marriage?
Addison: No, no, no, no, I just am, until it feels right, until I'm sure.
Kevin: Okay, so we'll wait. I'm good with waiting. I'm happy with waiting.
Addison: Really?
Kevin: No, but I can wait.
- - -
Addison (on her lunch break at the hospital): Just so we're clear, this is not a date, this is a sandwich between surgeries.
Kevin: The point is we're getting to know each other without all that dating crap.
Addison: Is this what you've been working on, that's kept you from calling?
Kevin: I watched two people die, count me in for a bad week.
Addison: Yeah, I've been having one of those myself, not people dying just people not talking to me, people not talking to each other, all the people in my office are walking around pissed off and nobody's talking about it. That's why I'm here cutting people open.
Kevin: Letting out your hostilities?
Addison: Actually, you put a scalpel in my palm and I feel centered, all the other problems in the world just fall away.
- - -
(Addison on her way to the hospital)
Kevin: Addison?
Addison: Oh hey it's you.
Kevin: Swat guy.
Addison: Yeh hey hey ah listen about that message I left...
Kevin (laughs): That was am...
Addison: Humiliating
Kevin: No, I liked it.
Addison: Yeah, well that explains a lot, you torture women to the point of them calling you and leaving horrifying messages because you like it? You're, you're sick.
Kevin: I'm sorry, I've been working like a dog, I get on a case and I promise to do better. I came to woo.
Addison: Woo?
Kevin (shows Addison a box of donuts): I've got sprinkles.
Addison: This is you wooing?
Kevin: This is me being charmed by your rambling and incoherent message and asking you to lunch.
Addison: I'm ah, off to surgery.
Kevin: Don't write me off, get to know me.
- - -
Cooper (sarcastically): You're in a good mood?!
Charlotte: Your Montgomery's a real star. Cash cow for me today. Really made me look good.
Cooper (sarcastically): I'm glad someone does.
Charlotte: Stop moping! I don't like moping sex!
Cooper: I have a kid with a big head. Turns out he has nothing wrong with him, except he's gonna be mocked, ridiculed and looked down upon for the rest of his life.
Charlotte: And that's your fault?
Cooper: No, that's me. I'm the one who doesn't fit in, who's gonna be first out of the practice just because they don't want me on the team anymore. I'm the big head kid!
Cooper: Oh my God! You are pathetic. You are crazy and pathetic. Big head's not a problem. It's a virtue, moron. You know who had a big head?! Lincoln, JFK, Elvis, Einstein... plenty of people have big heads and they don't sit and mope that they have a big head. So don't you sit and mope that you're a pediatrician. Do your job, do it well, and screw everyone else. You're the big head kid. More power to ya!
- - -
(to Sam)You suck at being Naomi.
Addison
- - -
Charlotte: I miss the good old days. When life and death was decided by God instead of doctors.
Violet: Well, we'll be out of jobs.
